oo 

 

 

 

 

 

zozo 

its a girl!!!!!

my baby is a sweet baby girl!!! im still kinda wary abt blogging, since some pple who read this blog like to blab, but hey, what the hell. i dont care anymore, cos im sooooo happy!! i get to buy cute little pinky stuff, and we r gonna name her zoe, it means 'God-given life' :) im thinking of moving my blog. thinking...

my baby!!

guess what?!?!?!?!?
im NOT 3 months pregnant.
*BUMBUMBUM*!!!!
IM EIGHTEEN WEEKS AND TWO DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
baby is 18 weeks old!!!!!
darren and i just got the ultrasound results on tuesday!!! it was such a blessing in disguise - we decided to visit the doc just on the spur of the moment, but i think it was also God's leading - and we had to wait for a whole hr in the waiting room cos it was so busy. and when the doc came in, it was a different doc from the old white doc we were seeing since i found out i was pregnant. the new doc was a young chinese doc fresh outta med school. so we were thinking of coming back again when our old doc was in, but as the new doc - dr. tsoi - was looking through my file, he saw that the old doc didnt even record my second visit and he hadnt done any of the tests that he was supposed to have done, and since its my first pregnancy, i didnt know what had to be done or not. and he saw that my old doc hadnt started me on a 2 pg prenatal check up form, and hadnt given me a full check up...and i remembered that all he did was take my blood pressure.
sooooo darren and i were like ok, switch doctors. and the dr tsoi was really nice...cos the wating room was really full, and he'd already spent a long time with us, he told us the 'truth' abt how docs operate - they like to ask the patient to come back, so they earn more money. but he said that if we came back again later that night, he'd do all the necessary tests for free! praise God!
so we went back, and i got my first pap smear - darren held my hand and they both talked me through it so it wasnt that bad - just a bit plasticky - and a full check up and he gave me forms for more blood work and an ultrasound in a month to find out the baby's gender and to make sure the baby is normal. soooo cool!! AND we heard the baby's heartbeat for the first time!!!!! the doc let us listen for a really long time, and he said that the baby has a healthy heartrate :) praise GOD!!! im sooooooo excited!!
i thought i was only at 12 weeks, so i never felt for the baby's movements, cos i thought it was just gas, youre not supposed to be able to feel the baby till after 16 weeks. and i didnt think that i was so far along in my pregnancy either cos im still so small! i can still fit into my regular jeans, although they are a tad tight after i eat. :P so now, i spend every morning lying in bed just feeling baby wiggle around and kick...hes more active in the mornings :)
we helped soo and ray paint their baby room on sunday - darren did most of the painting, i did most of the sitting and eating hehehe. but the room is soooo lovely, and theyve got a crib and everything and it just got me so excited to be pregnant and to be having a baby...and everytime i see a mother and her child i get so impatient for my own...hehe a baby truly is a gift from GOD!!!!!
sooooooo that also means that my due date is earlier - around july 20th.

*this is an excerpt from an email to my mom, cos im too lazy to type all that all over again :P*

so....im really really excited and i cant wait to know if its a boy or a girl...will update again once we know! :)

husband and wife at last :) 

the girls 

my wonderful church family 

hehe the guys 

new family 

my new in-laws 

me mommy and daddy 

the signing! 

the kiss! 

the rings! 

love this shot 

in the gazebo 

my beautiful parents 

ooo whats that boy doing there? 

me 

my GQ man 

its official

so, its finally official: i'm pregnant, and i'm getting married to the most wonderful man alive. im so happy. i'll be mrs.lee in 14 days...and a mother in 7 months. life is good. God is good. it wasnt easy, being pregnant and not being able to tell anyone about it cos - i was too scared being a Christian, unmarried girl - and just the fact that i was pregnant. and i was also puking 24/7. i had no idea how to tell my parents, and i was freaking out alot. i found out on the first day of my finals. thank God i pulled through and scored B's. but darren...he was really awesome. he comforted me and was always there for me, taking care of me, praying for me. his name means strong tower, and that was exactly what he was. when i was feeling so lonely and scared and far away from God, he was my refuge, my strong tower. he kept on telling me that everything was gonna be ok. and even though he was scared too, he trusted that God will take care of us, and forgive us. he made plans for us, and really really supported me during my first few months. he is really really awesome. im so glad im going to marry him. when we told his parents, they were really supportive and forgiving right away. his mom held my hand and said she loves me as her own daughter, and that they will help and support us. my parents didnt take it too well. i think it was harder for them too cos they r so far away. but they eventually came around and forgave us, and i know they still love me. everyone at church was really forgiving too, and loving. it was so hard telling pple, cos i felt so ashamed and scared and afraid. but soo came to talk to me, and she said that we should be proud that we r doing the right thing and having the baby and getting married. she really helped so much during this difficult time. so now, we r trying to put our mistakes behind us, and do the right thing for us and the baby. we'll be getting married feb 7th (the official signing) and having the wedding celebration after the baby is born. if its a boy, we'll name him zion. if it's a girl, cassie. :) im so happy and im falling more and more in love with darren...he's proven himself to be a great man over and over again. and im slowly learning more and more about the reality and strength of God's love, forgiveness, mercy and grace. i still cant fathom it, but im slowly understanding it not just as head knowledge, but heart knowledge.
well, im really tired now. will update soon. my dramatic life is not concluded.

testing